About the statement "The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives"
Essay:Reviewing back to history, science existed before it was mentioned. Since science itself possesses both advantages and disadvantages in different fields, in the usage of scientific projects, forecasting the consequences became the most important process for pre-scientific projects. Improving scientific knowledge and applying it to different purposes, enhances both the positive and negative consequences if the caution is less presentable in the situation.
The world is composed of different varieties of living species species, [Possible missing comma found.] and people should be aware that having the intention of surviving alone will make the goal more unreachable. With the help of science, people's health, living, and education are undeniably easier than before. I agree with the statement that " " [Incorrectly used dash or quote characters; Don’t put a space on both sides of a quote symbol.]The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives " [Punctuation Error; Unpaired symbol: ‘"’ seems to be missing] to some extent. It is evident that scientists normally aim for the advantage of others unless complicated politics or business projects are not included. Thinking about the improvement of people's lives, improving only people's lives, and degrading natural resources are not acceptable and , and [Punctuation Error; Use a comma before “and” if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).] the result will last only temporarily. The help of nature plays an enormous support in lasting the last more permanent.
In my way of thinking, science's purpose should be the process of improving people's lives by upgrading the earth's health. The purity of air, water, the diversity, and the abundant [Grammar Error; The phrase ‘the abundant of’ is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between ‘the’ and ‘of’.] of natural resources will upgrade the quality of people's lives. In conclusion, people, being the smart species in nature, have a definite responsibility to improve themselves and their surroundings. The most important part is that people need to have a strong morality in every field and every usage.
Overall Band Score
6.5 - Lexical Resource
6.0 - Task Response
6.0 - Grammatical Range and Accuracy
How to improve your band score?
Coherence Cohersion Feedback - 6.0
Lexical Resource Feedback - 6.5
Grammatical Range Accuracy Feedback - 6.0
Detailed Feedback and Analysis
Error Type: Coherence and Cohesion
Error: Lack of clarity and coherence in connecting ideas within the sentence.
Correction: To improve coherence, consider restructuring the sentence to clearly connect the idea of advantages and disadvantages with forecasting consequences in scientific projects.
Explanation: The sentence lacks clear connection between the idea of science having advantages and disadvantages and the importance of forecasting consequences. Restructuring will help improve coherence.
Sentence: Improving scientific knowledge and applying it to different purposes, enhances both the positive and negative consequences if the caution is less presentable in the situation.
Error Type: Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Error: Incorrect use of "presentable" which does not fit contextually.
Correction: Replace "presentable" with a more suitable word like "evident" or "evident."
Explanation: The word "presentable" does not fit well in this context. Using a more appropriate word will enhance clarity and accuracy.
Sentence: With the help of science, people's health, living, and education are undeniably easier than before.
Error Type: Lexical Resource
Error: Inappropriate use of "undeniably" which does not fit well in this context.
Correction: Replace "undeniably" with a more suitable word like "significantly" or "noticeably."
Explanation: The word "undeniably" may not be the best choice here. Using a more fitting term will enhance lexical resource.
Overall Feedback:
- Work on improving coherence by ensuring clear connections between ideas within sentences.
- Enhance grammatical accuracy by using appropriate words that fit well within the context.
- Expand your range of vocabulary to express ideas more effectively.